“Prostitutes are in no danger of finding their present life so satisfactory that they cannot turn to God: the proud, the avaricious, the self-righteous, are in that danger.” – CS Lewis

This June will mark four years of living in Arizona.

Four long years.

We made a move across the country from North Carolina in 2006 due to my wife’s employer relocating her.  Both of us were born and raised in North Carolina, where the unspoken rule is that you live and die there, living no further than 14 minutes from your parents in the meantime.  Needless to say, our move to the desert was not highly approved, especially by my family.  My wife’s is much more understanding in this area.  Or, perhaps they’re just less vocal than mine.  But I digress.

It felt, in many ways, like starting a life from scratch.  Everything changed: jobs, culture, weather, grocery stores, traffic, churches, and….

Relationships.

Most everything else has been fairly easy to adjust to.  Relationships, however, are a much different story.

It seems like most people already have the maximum number of active relationships that they can handle, and simply do not have any more of themselves to give to a new relationship.  Those with kids tend to typically interact with other folks who have kids, which makes sense to a certain degree.  So, being new to the area and having no kids has proven to create a difficult scenario for my wife and I.  Relationships that we maintain from North Carolina have expectedly become more difficult, as we either communicate via voicemail, text message or social media.  These methods of communication are all fine and well, but they do not replace real interaction with people.

And boy do we know it.

It’s easy to take on a mixture of emotions, including bitterness, loneliness, and my favorite choice: cynicism.

Community seems difficult to have and maintain.

But perhaps it seems this way because we’ve made community about what we can get and how much we have to give in order to obtain it.

It’s quite selfish, really.

There is a cost involved with community.

Time, patience, forgiveness, your own interests.

Grace.

I feel like I’ve been living this “victim” role for too long.  It’s a form a pride, after all.  It’s high time I start to engage with people where they’re at, not requiring us all to be the same.

People in real community should be stronger because of their differences, not weaker.  As believers, we should remember that we all have one thing in common for sure:  the Holy Spirit.

How about you?  What do you think?

What has been your experience in community, both successful and not successful?

image: sam

“Beauty is not democratic; she reveals herself more to the few than to the many…”   - CS Lewis

Twitter.

If you haven’t heard of it by now, I’m sorry for your loss.  You’ve kind of missed out. There’s still time, though.

But, on the other hand, I’m envious of you.  I’ve known about Twitter for a while, but have done a horrible job in terms of my participation level with it.  And I mean horrible, people.

I predominately tweet via my phone, and the town I work in gets little to no data coverage.  So, during business hours - not many tweets.  There are only two places in town here that have wi-fi capabilities, so it’s a challenge to carry conversations with folks who are active on Twitter.

I also have to admit that Twitter tends to push my cynical button.

It seems to me that Twitter is full of folks quoting other folks, who were quoting other folks in the first place.  There’s also a lot of marketing happening on Twitter, which is not necessarily a bad thing.  But again, if you were to follow me on Twitter, you would see me “marketing” my blog posts for the week, and perhaps even quoting someone.

Hey, I’ve never claimed to be void of any hypocrisy.

But, there are those of you who are doing it well.  You’re connecting with other folks on a level beyond 140 characters that would have otherwise never been able to do.  You’re joining in with other people to make a difference in your cities and communities. Some of you are being discovered on Twitter and getting books published, even.  Others are networking with other professionals across the world that work in your field.  Above all, those of you doing it well are doing something amazing.

Building relationships.

I love that.  That’s what keeps me from kicking it to the curb.

So, for all of you (and especially you Twitter veterans) I ask:

Why do you Twitter?

Where are you @? [your twitter handle]

(plug away…I’d love to follow and learn some things.)

It is a poverty to decide that a child must die so that you may live as you wish.  - Mother Teresa